Why The Long Face?

And now IKEA. I’m so upset about the meatballs, apart from pretending you live there and enjoying the immense risk and danger of going off the path, those meatballs were the best things about IKEA. Now we find out that the secret to their deliciousness may have been in the beef…the secret being that is wasn’t all beef, some of it was horse.

This news story has rather rocked our country in the recent weeks. Naturally, there is outrage that this has so easily happened and we, the consumer, have been eating something without being made aware of it. As many articles have pointed out, this is more an issue of fraud than of food safety. It also begs the questions of why beef is being substituted for horse; according to Q & A Horsemeat Scandal, it’s because horsemeat is cheaper than beef so the substitution is an easy way of making the meat go further.

As well as outrage coming from the fraud aspect of the scandal, there is also something about eating horse that feels essentially ‘wrong’ to many Britains. Eating horse in Britain became taboo gradually, we were certainly munching away on geegees at the end of the last ice age, so what changed? It’s likely to be around the same time horses became domesticated that peoples’ attitude towards them began to change and there is evidence of this happening as early as 4000 BC.



However, as with many of the big changes in Britain, the main influence seems to have come from the Church. At some point, possibly as far back as 732 AD, the Vatican announced that eating horse was a pagan activity and not acceptable behaviour among well-to-do Catholics. This decision was fairly widely rebuked by most European countries who continued nibbling their neighing Nellys well into the nineteenth century, but it does seem to have had quite an impact on English-speaking countries. Perhaps this religious influence, paired with the psychological impact of our relationship with horses, is what has made eating horse just not the done thing.



 Drawing on the psychological aspects, and desperately clawing my way back to a publishing and book related topic, I thought I’d look at horses in literature that encourage our sentimental attachment to the animal.



One of my favourites is Angharrad from the Chaos Walking trilogy by Patrick Ness. Angharrad is a gentle soul who is one of the only characters to understand Todd, Ness’ troubled protagonist.

Good old Boxer in George Orwell’s Animal Farm. Poor, dimwitted Boxer is a stoical chap who believes in hard work and a good regime. He never doubts the words of those in command, unfortunately, it is this that leads to his downfall.





Fledge the winged wonder. Formally known as Strawberry, he worked in London pulling handsome cabs, but in true C.S Lewis style, he is magically transported to Narnia and given wings by Aslan.

Shadowfax, the chief of the Mearas. One of those names I can’t say in a normal voice (have to either sound like Aslan or Mufassa saying "Simba!"). He’s fearless, fast and fighsty; only Gandalf is permitted to ride him and that's only if Shadowfax allows. It is due to his epicness that we get the line “Run, Shadowfax, show us the meaning of haste.”



A horse that has made me cry more than any other is the kind, gentle and brilliantly brave Joey, a war horse like no other. Told from Joey’s point of view, War Horse by Michael Morpurgo lets you to really get to know and feel for this incredible character.



Last but not least, probably the most famous horse in British literature, Anna Sewell’s Black Beauty. I definitely cried a lot at this book too. Kindness, sympathy and respect are big themes in this story and similarly to Joey in War Horse, Black Beauty tells his own story. Through his life we see the full range of treatment horses can expect at the hands of humans. If any horse can teach us what the relationship between man and beast can mean, it’s Black Beauty.

 

 

Book Review: Tethers by Jack Croxall

I love a good prologue, especially in young adult adventure novels. It sets my imagination whirring, questions sprouting and I know I have to read on to find the answers. This is exactly what happened with the prologue in Tethers. Why won’t Marriot’s gun work? Who is this mysterious, snarling Mr Dufor? What are Locus One and Locus Three? Who is ‘the girl’ and most importantly, will Mr Dufor murder her?

Predictably, after scooping my ponderings into my arms and curling up so I could pin them to my chest with my knees, I read on as fast I could. Then I realised I wasn’t taking enough in so stopped, drank some tea, grabbed a biscuit and started again.

Tethers is very easy to read, it is well written and paragraphs glide by smoothly. The two main characters are engaging from the start; you recognise Karl as an adventurous young man with a slight disregard for rules, and Esther is immediately likeable with her ‘scorched-black hair’ and skill for arguing. The tranquil start to their adventure is shaped by descriptions of the sleepy village of Shraye in Victorian Lincolnshire. Croxall definitely has a knack for recreating those rural scenes and grand skies that, coming from Lincolnshire myself, I recognise appreciatively. The story then accelerates in an almost alarming manner as Karl and Esther are suddenly thrown in the path of danger, but the pace slows almost as rapidly as it sped up while they decide their course of action. I liked this unexpected change of step as it gave the story a sense of realism and provided Croxall with the opportunity to develop his characters further. It also meant that when the next dramatic event revealed itself it still felt shocking and exciting, but the structure wasn’t choppy or awkward. I found this wave-like pattern of thrills and calm, which continued throughout the book, reassuring. It gave me time to get to know the characters, to revel in their stories and personalities but never get too comfortable, as I knew something exciting would be waiting on the next page.

Being set in Victorian England gives this book a historical gleam, but its true colours lie more in adventure. As a science writer, Croxall does have a clear science fiction leaning, and the mysteries of the otherworldly stone, the Viniculum, that is found by Karl and Esther certainly have answers buried in science. However, this is not the selling point for me with Tethers. I found the most compelling aspects to be in the characters, their decisions and their motivations. It was this that created the drama for me, more so than the dangerous conspiracy right at the novel’s core. Perhaps, however, I have just tapped into the essence of why this book is called Tethers. Normal peoples’ actions, the consequences of those actions and what tethers everything together can be incredibly powerful. Alas, I’m being mysterious myself now as I don’t want to give too much away, you will have to read it to know what I mean.

 However, as much as I loved this aspect of the book, I also felt it was its only flaw. So important are the characters in this book that I wanted more from Croxall about who these people were and how they all became involved in this story. An almost impossible thing to do I grant you, by spending more time and words on character detail you run the risk of losing pace, excitement and of making the text too heavy. But I felt with Croxall’s writing everything I wanted was there in his head, it was there in his style and in ideas but was just missing from the paper. He knows the secrets in the lives of his characters and they are hinted at but never given away. Perhaps I am being too impatient and all I want will be revealed in the next two books in the trilogy, but it does make it impossible for Tethers to stand alone successfully for me. Certainly Croxall has confessed that Karl and Esther will return with new friends and old for more adventure so I will hope that I will find answers hidden in their pages.

I would definitely recommend Tethers to any fans of Phillip Pullman’s His Dark Materials, or Percy Jackson lovers. You are quickly sucked into the adventure, friendship and mystery encapsulated in this book and Croxall’s skill as a writer means he is certainly one to watch for the future. 

 @JackCroxall and blogs at www.jackcroxall.co.uk 

Tethers Kindle edition is available on Amazon

The Do's and Do Not's of Dating Like a Fictional Character

My beautiful tulips from...?

If you’re on of the lucky ones going on a date tonight, well, you’re probably not reading this. But, if you are one of those lucky ones and are going out a bit later tonight so have time to sample this literary delight, you are even luckier than first you thought. Why? Because I am going to give you some advice.

A simple list of do's and do not's from the literary world to make your evening less of a disaster, or not a disaster at all if you're very clever. You can give yourself points for each one you know if you like.

DO: jump off several buses, fight some people and partake in a car chase. As long as you order your martini shaken, not stirred, you can get away with anything.

DON’T: accept the honour of being the Hand of the King if it’s offered to you on your way to your date. Ned Stark accepted and unfortunately lost at the Game of Thrones.

DO: put a lot of thought into dressing yourself. If you’ve ever read the Odyssey you’ll know a lot can be gained through a heroic dressing scene.

DON’T: follow any rabbits with pocket watches down rabbit holes. Very unwise. If, however, the rabbit doesn’t have a pocket watch you might be OK, but don’t be late, late, for a very important date.

DO: make sure, if female, that your eyes are looking particularly ‘fine’ this evening. Any Mr Darcy’s hovering around will find you irresistible.

DON’T: marry them if you know they are a member of your rival family. It all ends in tears believe me.

DO: take their hand if they are sitting upon a magic carpet asking “do you trust me?” They might show you a whole new world.

DON’T: be put off if they turn out to be a werewolf. They may lead somewhat troubled lives but some are actually very nice, as long as they’ve taken their Wolfsbane potion, and they make very good Defence Against the Dark Arts teachers.

DO: slam on the breaks if you see a distressed woman running out in front of your car. It could be that she is the lover of your husband and he was previously driving this car, which actually belongs to your lover. Killing her will cause an awful rumpus, as if there isn't enough confusion anyway. (Ten points if you guessed this one).

DON’T: press the red button. (That’s not from any book I can think of but it’s still good advice).

Follow these simple steps and you should have a stress-free romantic evening, I’m sure of it.